No announcement yet.

What are your most retarded things you've had happen or done in your M3?

This is a sticky topic.
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • What are your most retarded things you've had happen or done in your M3?

    1.) Had panel under steering column fall and lock my foot on the throttle while driving with 2 other E30 M3's and a E28 M5.

    2.) Had to find lost washers under my cams.

    3.) Changed control arms because this one road had my steering dance. Turned out it was the road.

    4.) Worked hours trying to findout why car wouldn't start. The AFM was unplugged.

    5.) Didn't know why car idled like crap. I kept giving it gas. Realized My oil cap was off and was spraying a new Merc next to me with oil.

    I know there's more trapped in this Big Head with little brains....

    Disclaimer: Remember, I know absolutely nothing, but it doesn't prevent me from having an opinion or suggestion. :

  • #2
    Re: What are your most retarded things you've had happen or done in your M3?

    Originally posted by Magnus
    I know there's more trapped in this Big Head with little brains....
    Wow, does having a bunch of little brains work better then one large one?? :p

    90 Sterling 2.5L E30///M3 lifer
    97 Porsche Carrera S
    13 Audi S6
    SOLD 03 Audi RS6 daily
    GONE 88 E28///M5 project


    • #3
      #5 Oil Filler Cap

      I've done this, felt like such a tool after spending 15 min. trying to figure out why my car idled like a muscle car.



      • #4
        while magnus was trying to install my sparco bar, the hood fell on my big halogen lamp and put a nice rhino horn in my sure he has some pic of it.

        changed my oil and took it for a short drive realizing my oil cap was off...made a big mess....definately more then once

        im hoping someone will say changing the oil and forgot to put the screw back in while putting new oil in....anyone??????

        pulling into my garage, kinda hit my garage at the same time...not good

        driving 5 mph and having my borla exhaust fall off

        scariest thing was right behind magnus at around 45 mph and his reverse lights come on....wasnt fun

        there is more but thats enough to take the cake i think
        Old School


        • #5
          1) Throttle stuck wide open at VIR out of turn one. Throttle cable clips were in the poddock in the tool box, duh.

          2) Changing cell values of a fuel map while driving down the road. Mistakenly hit only 1 instead of 13, felt like I hit a brick wall @6000 rpm. No damage though.

          3) Ditto on the AFM thing.

          I know there's more........



          • #6
            where to start...

            No coolant cap...realized after about 80 miles...

            No power steering cap...too many times to remember(i had to refill every other day when i had a leak...

            Drained the oil while on ramps...then drove off the ramps to get it to drain out better...yes i started the car with no oil...This happened twice...and you wonder why my car hasnt run in a year...

            Drove into the back of lexus truck...DOH

            Touched the headers after the car ran for a minute...OUCH

            AFM unplugged-no start....a few times

            too many mistakes to remember to plug things in...and what not after doing a repair/mod...

            Yes...i have ADD...and a horrible memory..leave me a lone...its a good thing i put my engine back together based solely on memory...why do i have 3 extra hoses? and all these extra parts?

            If you dont have extra parts left didnt do the job right...



            • #7
              This wasn't in my M3, it was in the 90 BMW E30 325i 4door automatic I had just before it. I know it's not a M3, but this story is too embarrassing not to mention.

              I had just gotten the car and my liceanse. I got a call to meet up with some friends at a putput golf course. This was the first time I had driven alone. All was well, I got there in one peice. With the music blaring I approached the parking lot, I could see a congregation of my friends waiting for me. As I prepared to park for the first time in my life I looked out my window and saw one of the perkiest sets of tits on this planet staring right back at me. I was about 15 feet away from the brick wall infront of the parking spot going about 6-7mph so I began to apply the brakes gently while staring at the jugs. As I applied the brakes, my car accelerated, so insinctively I pushed harder. Less than a second later and after 15 feet of pure acceleration of automatic goodness I stoped. I had rammed a brick wall infront of five girls and some of my best friends. I haven't forgotten it, neither have my friends, the girls, or everyone else in the world they told.

              PS: I drove one of those girls home that night, she held onto the door handle the whole time. At times she seemed like she was praying, and her knuckles holding onto the door were white.
              Last edited by ///TILTED; 09-18-2003, 03:27 PM.
              I am stationary at forty miles an hour.
              ///Mark Dowst


              • #8
                1. ive done the afm thing. its a common thing it looks like.

                2. stuck throtle cable is also common.

                3. battery cable fell off on a off ramp, three times. all completely diffrent times.

                4. bumper fell off on freeway after someone had hit it at work. i didnt think they had damaged it that bad, but they had busted the retainers on top.

                5. all my rear rim bolts were very loose. this was strange since the day before they were fine, i was hoping i caught someone trying to do it again... :grr:

                like you guys im sure i forgot some, but ive had alot of strange stuff happen in this car.
                "Just road, seat, ASS; THE END!" - Jeremy Clarkson
                "If you had a choice between a million dollars and world peace, what would you get for your E30 M3?" - ItsNotTheNissan


                • #9

                  Having Sex in the rear seats , then driving to show some friends my car. They wondered where the circular patches of oil on the windows were from? :evil: I'm a baldy.

                  Disclaimer: Remember, I know absolutely nothing, but it doesn't prevent me from having an opinion or suggestion. :


                  • #10
                    I've done most of those but the worst has to be when I forgot to torque the lug bolts on all 4 wheels:idea:

                    I had just had the problem of the center support bushing go bad (like a week before) and the sway bar end links breaking both causing a horrid vibration, so I figured that something else was bad, but I could make it the 2 miles home no prob just cruising.

                    just as that thought passes through my head the rear end of my car jumps up and then falls to earth making a very bad thunk. then lots of sparks and loud grinding.

                    as soon as i think WTF just happened, i watch my pretty passenger M-contour roll past me on the street, up the sidewalk and resting on somebodys yard.

                    cop just happens to pull up as I'm getting out of the car to asses the damage, then after telling him what happened he cant help but crack up. made me feel sheepish:sosad:

                    the car landed on the rotor and the backing plate. I farmer wrenched the backing plate back into order (hammer) and all was well

                    Karl Kraus --Education is a crutch with which the foolish attack the wise to prove that
                    they are not idiots.


                    • #11
                      1. Forgot lug nut for my track wheels when I was 300mi away.
                      2. when changing out my OBC lights, I could not figure out why it would not go on, with the headllights on, you need the key to be on!
                      3. Paid $30 to have my engine fan removed, I could not get the dam thing off!
                      4. Paid $1000 in labor to replace my subframe bushings, & trailing arm bushings, never went back there.
                      5.Didn't torque caliper bolts when rebuilding calipers.
                      6. When I put CHF (self leveing fluid) in my brakes (Napa guy picked it out for me), then lost my brakes going 40mph at a stop lights.
                      7. 2 weeks after that I lost my clutch downtown, and had to replaced the slave and master on downtown streets.
                      8, just did this the other day, sprayed paint prep on my windshield, thought it was clas cleaner (same bottle, same looking tag) it left little spots all over my car, I had to clay, polish and wax, to fix, bottle now has red tape on it and is not with my car care stuff.
                      9. this is the best one.....
                      Gould not figure out why my car ran like CRAP, replaced a bunch of sensors, wasted a ton of time, turns out my plugs were fowled!!

                      Now, lets not forget I have had my M3 since 1995, and was 20yo when I got it.

                      Do not click
                      At least it's German


                      • #12
                        Maybe not as many as some of you guys but mine are just as impressively dumb!

                        1: Dealer left off the oil cap when I went to pick up the car, drove 12 mile round trip to replace tyres (at dealers expense) and complained that car wasn't running right when I got back......oil sprayed everywhere:idea:

                        2: After changing my water pump I checked, double checked and triple checked that all the clips on the hoses were tight.....but forgot to check that the bottom hose on the rad was actually fully home! Got half a mile down the road and all of a sudden my temp guage goes through the roof......funny how quickly they get hot with no coolant in!:rolleyes:

                        3: When removing my alternator to do the bushes had a friend chatting to me and generally getting in the way...forgot to disconnect the battery first and launched a big ol' spark off my spanner.

                        4: One week after picking up my car my dad decides he wants to clean his car on my drive, I go to move forward to line up before reversing up my drive, my dad is already reversing towards me so I whizz back a bit quicker than intended and scrape the offside rear-quarter on a concrete post!:grr:

                        5: At the start of this year I hit the throttle too early out a bend and the back came round a little on me, caught it but not very wide road meant I run the front corner up the side of an oncoming Mercedes.......Mercedes driver not very happy with me (understandably), my car was written off and I still miss it so much now! :sosad:

                        Sad note to end on but I WILL have another E30 M3 one day, just gotta sort my life and head out and I will be back....:cool:


                        • #13
                          1. Oil cap

                          2. Broke key off in door... on a date (she was impressed)

                          3. I like to "loosen" bolts by turning them clockwise

                          4. Started the car with the front end on jack stands... oh and it was in 1st gear with my Dad under it. Fortunatly it didn't fall.

                          5. Had a multi part, dealer option radar detector installed by PO, but didn't work when I bought it. The front sensor was bolted in behind the front grill, when I removed it, I didn't put the bolt back in (thinking it was worthless). Closed the hood, wouldn't shut first time, so I pushed a bit harder Then a dent shows up in the middle of the hood. Turns out the bolt held the hood latch in place... the throttle arm or whatever it's called punched up into the hood.

                          6. Used 1st gear a bit too liberally in an AutoX course, did a full 360. A Firebird Formula did the same thing... he was in my class too!

                          7. Not my fault, but still crappy, a shop light fell on the car not 6hrs after we finished painting it, left a nice dent/scratch.

                          That's probably it...
                          Last edited by Beau; 09-19-2003, 02:29 AM.


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Beau
                            3. I like to "loosen" bolts by turning them clockwise

                            LOL! I've done that one as well, sheared the first bolt out of the water pump pulley!
                            I'm such a mechanical genius at times!:huh:


                            • #15


                              I forgot to tell Don fields and 4 other people my hood shock was dead. Left a nice road rash on his face.

                              Used the CLUB® at Jones beach but didn't bring the key. $$$$ Nice tow fee.

                              Jack broke so I had to teeter the car on 3 wheels and a curb. Ghetto style.

                              Dropped 2 new rims on the sidewalk while stacking them 2 minutes after recieving them.

                              Having a whole container of BMW coolant break-open in my trunk.

                              Fouled spark plugs too, after replacing some sensors/ relays.

                              Have Nick-NY try to fit my Sport evo steering wheel on. Took an hour, forgot to put key into location 2 inorder to remove it.

                              Put car SHAMPOO into my window washer continer instead of glass cleaner. Bubbly situation....

                              There's more......

                              :idea: :sosad:

                              Disclaimer: Remember, I know absolutely nothing, but it doesn't prevent me from having an opinion or suggestion. :